Do they know how good they have it?

Near the end of my freshman year in high school, my family moved to Berlin, Germany from Havelock, North Carolina. During my three years there, I kept in touch with several friends by mail, and through those friends several others by proxy. It was tough to keep it up, though, because the lag in communication was so long. Eventually I lost contact with most of them. Facebook and Myspace give us all the tools to get back in touch and catch up, but I wonder how many take advantage of it in a meaningful way.

Let's look at the past and the present by the numbers:

1991

• 1 - 2 hours: Time it took to draft an informal personal letter to a good friend.
• 2 weeks: Time it took to send a letter from Berlin, Germany to the U.S, using the U.S. government postal system.
• 1 month: Minimum amount of time it took to receive a written response to a letter.
• 3-6 months: Amount of time between speaking with good friends across the ocean.
• $25: The approximate cost of a phone call lasting less than 30 minutes (that's about $50 in today's dollars).

Today

• 1 -15 minutes: Time it takes to draft an email.
• 30 seconds: Time it takes for a friend to receive an email after it's been sent.
• A few minutes: Time it takes to receive a response.
• 1 week: Amount of time between speaking with good friends across the ocean.
• Free: The approximate cost of a 30 minute phone call, using the right technology (ISP fees excluded).

A word of caution:

As the cost of communication decreased and the speed increased, the frequency of trivial communication increased. Now it's easy to write a few words and send it off. While it may be quicker and more immediately gratifying, with the types of information we're typically sharing ("Hey, check out this link...What a L00ser") we can't say we're forming very meaningful interactions.

While these tools hold great promise, as Pope Benedict XVI said, they also pose risks that should not be ignored.

It's not altogether bad to keep in touch with a lot of people at a superficial level. After all, I found out years ago how hard it is to consistently hold a lot of meaningful long-distance friendships over a long period of time when you don't have the tools people have today.

However, we shouldn't forget that these tools should complement our relationships, not replace them. A status update on Facebook is good. A friendly conversation over lunch or a cup of coffee is better. - Cam Beck